Delhi Gang Rape Victim Passed Away.

I was awake at 6 am to be greeted by this tragic news. A young Indian student was raped not by 1 BUT by 6 guys and whacked with an iron rod. When they are done with her, threw her off the bus and left to die.

This incident sparked massive riot in India.

The poor girl underwent many operations to her damaged intestines, had cardiac arrests and other multiple organ issues.

As tensions mounted, Indian Govt proceeded after consulting with doctors there in both public & private hospitals to send the girl to Mount Elizabeth hospital in Singapore.

She arrived and was immediately treated by a group of multi disciplinary doctors who went ahead to stabilize her condition.

She died this morning at 0445hrs.

The men who raped her should be given the most barbaric punishment that they can think of equal to the pain that the girl went thru.

That stupid dumb scientist who SAID that the girl should have submit herself to the rape should be raped as well. She should be sued by the parents and publish a FULL PAGE apology to the parents.

Why would a woman want to be raped? Which woman wanna get raped?

I hope the poor girl soul should not rest yet but to come back & haunt those 6 rapist plus the stupid scientist bitch.

Sekadar Renungan

Salam,

Pagi tadi ku terlihat status update dari member sekolah yang aku amat hormati mengenai pasangan remaja yang mabuk menahan teksinya untuk ke sebuah hotel. Dia rasa serba salah kerana dia tidak dapat menunaikan permintaan mereka kerana tidak mahu rasa bersubahat.

Memanjang ku komen mengenai arak & persamaannya mengenai rokok. Tapi mungkin tidak dapat di terima ramai.

Tapi bukankah arak itu ibu segala maksiat atau permulaan bagi maksiat?

Ku remove komenku kerana ku rasa tidak dapat memdatangkan kebaikkan nyata terus ku ingin menyatakan hasrat ku & harap mendatangkan kebaikkan. di sini ku akan kupaskan pengalaman ku yang aku ingin kongsi.

Sewaktu ku bekerja di Hotel 8# dahulu, ku saksikan ramai anak anak muda yang ada sebaya umur ku, abang - kakak, pakcik - makcik atau atok atok yang datang ke hotel ini.

Maka ku pilih jalan yang sesuai untuk menjalankan tugas tanpa rasa janggal.

Pertama setiap kali ku nampak kelibat seseorang seperti Muslim, yang pertama ku lakukan - ku beri salam dan bersalaman dengan si lelaki.

Kita bersangka baik, walaupun hanya setakat 2 jam sahaja yang mereka akan gunakan. Ku tidak perlu bertanya jika mereka suami isteri atau tidak. Ia bukan urusan ku. yang penting ku tidak bersangka buruk kerana ku takkan tahu perihal perkara sebenar, kerana kalau ia perkara yang baik - aku akan melakukan fitnah.

Ini benar benar terjadi - ada 3 kisah yang nyata:

Seorang lelaki yang berumur dalam lingkungan 40-an masuk seorang diri dan ku memberi salam seperti biasa. Mendengar salam ku, secara automatik ia menjawab salam dan memberikan ku air muka yang sudah tahap menyampah dengan caraku.

Dia sudah keluarkan i/c nya dan sempat ku nampak namanya.

Tapi kemudiannya dia terus keluar  & tidak pula menanyakan tentang bilik untuk check in.

Kisah ke 2:

Sepasang pasangan muda check in dalam pukul 4 pagi dan ku memberi salam seperti biasa. Si perempuan ketawa sinis, se lelaki senyum tersipu tapi tetap menjawab.

Tidur semalam katanya selepas clubbing dan ingin rehat sebelum pulang kerana mulut masih bau arak.

Ku senyum mendengar alasannya - tidak menghukum kerana bukan tempatku untuk menghukum & aku juga sedang bekerja.

Mereka kemudian check in seperti biasa, dan masuk ke bilik kamar. Dalam CCTV yang ku saksikan, si lelaki berjauhan dengan si perempuan dan tidak bersamaan sepanjang perjalanan ke bilik. Tetapi tetap masuk bersama. Ku tetap bersangka baik dan teruskan kerja.

Dalam 15 minit kemudian telefon berdering dan ku jawab - asal dari bilik pasangan tadi.
si lelaki tanya di mana ada kedai untuk beli kotex. Di maklumkan kepada ku si perempuan sewaktu mandi terperasan beliau didatangi haid. Mujur rakan kerja ada spare terus memberi kepada si perempuan itu tadi. Suaranya seperti hampa...

Ku tetap bersangka baik & teruskan tugas.

Dalam pukul 7 pagi, si lelaki turun untuk menghisap rokok & ku pula sedang bersiap untuk pulang jadi terjumpa di carpark belakang hotel itu.

Ku bersalaman dan dia terus ucapkan terima kasih pada ku kerana menolongnya memberikan kotex itu semalam.

Ku tercengang & bertanya kenapa. Di ceritakan kepada ku tetapi ku pendekkan:

Mereka bukan pasangan suami isteri & hanya kenal antara satu sama lain sewaktu di club malam. jadi semasa dalam bilik pabila si perempuan hendak bersiap untuk mandi, ia terperasan ada yang tak kena mengenai si perempuan itu tapi kerana nafsu dia tolak tepi dan tunggu perempuan itu selesai mandi.

Apabila di maklumkan kepadanya yang si perempuan itu sedang kedatangan haid, beliau memang hampa tapi terus telefon kami di reception. Rakan kerja ku terus ke bilik mereka untuk memberikan kotex kepada lelaki itu.

Maka apabila dia memberikan kotex kepada perempuan itu, dia terperasan seperti ada tompok tompok merah yang bernanah di beberapa tempat tertentu pada tubuh perempuan itu.

Maka hilang segala nafsunya dan beliau berfikir panjang hingga ke pagi sementara perempuan itu mohon maaf kerana tidak dapat melayannya - sepatutnya haidnya tidak datang pada waktu itu.

Ku pun senyum dan nyatakan Allah masih menyayangi dia dan ku beritahu padanya suruh lakukan yang baik buat dirinya dan tinggalkan yang tidak baik dari diri nya.

Dia habiskan rokok & terus mohon diri untuk pulang tanpa mengambil duit deposit biliknya dan di tinggalkan untuk perempuan itu.

Kisah ke 3:

3 perempuan melayu pulang dalam pukul 4 pagi. Bau arak dan rokok masih ada di mulut mereka dan baju mereka sungguh menonjol sangat. Ku tetap senyum & beri salam seperti  biasa. Di jawab salamku dengan mata yang tajam. Kemudian minta kunci bilik mereka. ku ambil dari pigeonhole yang tersimpan  kunci itu termasuk kad pendaftaran mereka.

dalam pukul 6.45 pagi, ada 3 perempuan melayu bertudung keluar untuk check out. Bila ku capai kunci mereka, ternyata mereka adalah 3 perempuan melayu yang ku berikan kunci mereka sebelumnya.

Jadi di ambil kisah hidupku ini, dan ku letakkan diriku jika aku adalah rakan ku yang membawa teksi.
Pada ku, Allah SWT lebih mengetahui dan dia tahu kerelaan hati kita. Malah pada pendapat ku masih ada peluang bagi kawanku untuk memberikan dakwah yang terbaik buat mereka.

*memberi salam pada mereka
*dalam perjalanan ke hotel, berbual ramah dengan mereka - tidak perlu mengenai ugama tapi tanya berapa lama club, club mana yang best etc etc. korek mengenai latar belakang mereka - ia penting buat doa atau cegah kemungkaran.
*jalankan amanah tugas seperti biasa
*jangan ambil duit mereka jika rasa bersubahat atau kalau ambil, anggap lah ia satu duit tugasan, atau tidak dermakan sahaja.

*pertama - kita hanya manusia dan kita sudah berada tahap dewasa and kita sudah faham maksud ayat  amar maaruf nahi mungkar.

*kedua - kita tidak mampu cegah dengan kelakuan, kita cegah dengan lisan & kemudian hati.
dengan memberi salam, beramah mesra, dalam baik kita berdakwah & bersangka baik mengenai keadaan mabuk mereka - kerana ia Ibu segala maksiat, agar di terbitkan sedikit rasa keraguaan pada hati mereka yang kelakuan mereka lakukan itu tidak baik. Yang penting kita assertive mengenai perkara itu. Kerana bukan mereka tidak tahu yang perkara mereka lakukan itu salah..meraka tahu tapi buat tak tahu.

*ketiga - kita harus menjadi contoh dan senantiasa bersangka baik. Kemungkinan mereka telah berumah tangga pada awal usia muda tetapi masih belum mengenal erti maksud agama.

Jadi kalau kita cepat menghukum, kita tidak dapat menyelamatkan hati mereka. Yang penting hati mereka di detikkan untuk mereka fikir & dinilaikan kebaikkan atau keburukkan.

Tak rugi bersifat ehsan antara satu sama lain. Sebaik baik manusia, ialah mereka yang mencegahkan kemungkaran dalam apa jua perkara.

Kalau kita bersifat menghukum dan mencela, sampai bila pun kita sibukkan dengan aib atau kelakuan manusia sekeliling tapi tidak pula kita berkelakuan sedemikian dengan mereka yang ada ikatan silaturrahim.

Seperti -

a. isu aurat buat wanita
para isteri, anak anak dara atau sepupu sepupu yang tidak menutup aurat.
Perkara yang nyata dan mendatangkan azab buat kaum lelaki yang menjadi suami, bapa, abang, adik atau wali mereka.

Bukankah ini perkara bersubahat?

b. merokok
mereka yang menghisap rokok pun melakukan kemungkaran - dari segi:
i. kesihatan
ii. pembaziran wang

Dari kitab Imam Syafie,  Al-Umm, di nyatakan merokok itu haram hukumnya kerana yang di hisap itu adalah benda benda yang memudaratkan kepada badan kita untuk jangka panjang. jadi wajib kita mencegah kemungkaran ini yang berlaku sekeliling kita.

Hukum Makruh bukan dari segi erti maksud "di lakukan itu tidak dosa tapi kalau buat tidak pula berpahala"

Ia lebih bermaksud dari itu. Padaku ia perkara yang mendatangkan makna Makruh ialah harus di tinggalkan walaupun belum di nyatakan haram.

Kongsilah jika perlu.
Saya bukan orang yang bijaksana atau cerdik agama cuma saya rasa tidak patut kita dengan mudah mencela mereka yang bukan dalam arus agama. Malah sudah kewajipan sesama umat untuk ingat mengingati dan sama sama bersikap ehsan.

Kalau dah terkena dengan batang hidung sendiri dari anak - anak sendiri bagaimana pula? kalau dah members takkan nak maki anak members kan?

ini yang saya namakan - sibuk buka aib orang lupa mencari keredhaan Allah.

It's NOT just about Amy Cheong!

Well we heard the saga about her comments on the Malay Muslim Community... Now that the fuss has died down, life returns to normal and we go on happily THINKING that she is punished.

PUNISHED?

Why not examine?

Reflect?

Sometimes we get upset ABOUT other races comments on us..lets take a FINE example of one incident where it involves OUR own race dissing on our race..(oh nothing to do with those group who "oh sorry i m not ur typical malay or i dont date my own race - please eh..I PUT SAMBAL BELACAN ON A PLATE I AM SURE YOU WILL LICK THE PLATE CLEAN so STOP UR CRAP and enough of the accent..speak proper english please - i actually said this to a teller in a bank who decided to slang with me when i want to close an account OVER my insignificant amount of money in it... :P)

and here the story goes:

and guess what, this is an excerpt from a FACEBOOK status which was Copied and paste WITH permission from the owner:

"Look at this woman with 3 kids. Have to carry the small one and still guide the bigger children to board a bus. Might as well get a car or something"
Her daughter replies " Just typical some people only know giving birth to many kids but cannot afford to buy a car yet waste space taking public transport"
Now, please guess. WHO SAID THIS?

A chinese? A Malay or an INDIAN?

TELL ME NOW?

I was so pissed that i just had to blog this off! I even commented that if it was ME who was in her situation - i would give the person the 3s - STARE, SPIT & SHAMED.

Yes i got no qualms about shaming people..my mouth is so laser that i think they rather be nice to me than offend me...

well here is the full status:

A Malay makcik with her daughter who was seated behind me.
"Look at this woman with 3 kids. Have to carry the small one and still guide the bigger children to board a bus. Might as well get a car or something"
Her daughter replies " Just typical some people only know giving birth to many kids but cannot afford to buy a car yet waste space taking public transport"

I looked at both of them and smiled and said "Assalamualailum Selamat Pagi"then got off the bus. Nope I did not confront them either. I don't waste time on people like this. They don't walk my path or know my struggles so I choose to walk away.

I would rather struggle with my kids to board the public transport than to let my husband or my kids suffer the burden of paying off debts of owning a car. I keep my expectations on life realistic unlike those who are trapped with the life of "Biar papa kedana asalkan bergaya"

The problem with people these days are too caught up with all things material and forget that
"Kita ni semua Bakal Jenazah"

*i mean seriously what is wrong with these people who have the "holier than thou" attitude? Do you know that with my current income i am getting, i can get a car? i am THANKFUL that i dont have a license YET! hahaha i cant imagine the kind of financial commitments i have to make just to own something that cost almost HALF of a 3 room HDB flat yet it depreciates THE MOMENT I DRIVE IT OUT OF THE SHOWROOM!

to the makcik and daughter yang banyak komen...before you shoot off, next time, just remember that You are not in her shoes because: 

a. either you mandul and she your anak angkat so that's why your only daughter takes after you (attitude and all) (Edz's note: I AM STILL THE BIGGEST BITCH) 

b. you think that people with kids must have a mode of private transport and should be banned from public transport - i pity your future son in law - pay so much in dowry for such a useless brainless cow 

c. you think that with more kids means more money earn. Of course lah ini kan di janji Allah (this is what Allah promise) if He decides that you are ordained with 3 kids BUT as parents OF COURSE You have to work and find ways and means to earn enough to sustain the family. not to mention that you must set aside some monies for rainy days. 

so i wish good luck to your daughter. I cant wait for her to slog up the bus with probably 6 kids (twins each time she get pregnant) and i m dissing the same shit to her..as to why the hell is she up in public transport with 6 irritating kids... 

You dont like it right? 

So do i!

IDIOTS! 

Syukur Alhamdulillah Part II

Alhamdulillah.

That's all i can say.

Today, after 10 years, I sat for my Basic Theory Test again.

This time round with a resolution that i must eventually get my driving license not for myself but for my parents.

Reason being, they are getting old and i note that i move around a lot nowadays and getting a license is a logical step.

Besides, if friends from overseas - Miri & family comes over, at least i can drive them around - Insya Allah :)

So it was very different from how I went thru it 10 years ago. You get the result on the spot. Last time, i had to wait 2 weeks for the results to arrive.

and guess what's my result?

Scroll down!

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YAY! First hurdle clear! 

My ex-colleague - Sarini, recommended her PDI to me. Called him up and he is ok to take me but asked me to apply for my PDL first...

Alrighto...i will apply next week and start lessons after Raya! That would fantabulous... :) and i m gonna book my FTT soon as well. Get it done and over with!

Syukur Alhamdulillah to Allah SWT :) It makes my Ramadan more memorable.. i m thankful, grateful and happiness :) 

Syukur Alhamdulillah

Each year on the 25th of July, all of my colleagues will look forward to this date. Why?

Aside from the fact that it is our pay day, it is slightly different because, it is the day that we get our variable bonuses.

I have anticipated for this date for a long time. As for me, since my new boss came onboard, he has informed me that I will be on the commission scheme, incentive scheme and the allowance scheme.

So basically what he meant was:

a. my transport allowance starts from June 2012
b. i can claimed commissions for deals closed from April 2012 onwards
c. my incentives commissions is w.e.f April 2012 onwards

Alhamdulillah.

June 2012, they didnt pay my transport allowance and it will be paid in July 2012.

Therefore my July 2012 pay consist of:

July Basic Pay
July Transport Allowance
July Hp Allowance
Back pay for June Transport Allowance
Commission earned for the period of Apr 2012 to June 2012
Incentive earned for the period of Apr 2012 to June 2012
and the VARIABLE BONUS! i qualify for it because I was with the finance team for the last financial year (April 11 to Sep 11) & i didnt claim ANY commissions/incentive/allowance between Oct 11 to March 12.

It was my first ever good pay. I thank Allah for the rezeki and I never regretted my decision of joining the sales team.

Of course i shared this good fortune with family, friends and donated part of it to the mosque.

I hope to earn more in October during the next Quarterly pay out.

Oh, and the variable bonus is my last one - sales team no longer have any variable bonus.

but still i am thankful and greatful :) 

Dari Kaca Mata ku...

Alhamdulillah, dah 2 hari kita bersolat terawih. Setiap muslim tidak akan melepaskan peluang ini yang datang setahun sekali.

Di Pulau Singapura pun begitu, ramai bersungguh sungguh mengerjakan solat terawih, bersedekah, membaca Al Quran & lain lain yang mendatangkan kebaikkan pada diri mereka di bulan yang mulia ini.

Hari pertama & kedua ku berterawih di tempat yang sama - di kolong blok berhampiran dengan rumah ku.

Masjin An-Nur masih dalam peringkat naik taraf. Hari pertama ku bersama adik iparku & hari kedua seorang diri. Bapaku & adik lelaki ku kerja night shift...so tunggu mereka off baru boleh ajak gi terawih sesama - Insya Allah.

Tujuanku menulis di blog ini bukan untuk mencacat celakan sesiapa tapi sekadar peringatan buat semua.

Ada beberapa perkara yang ku rasa kurang elok yang masih di lakukan & antara mereka tidak sedar ATAU mungkin mereka have this "cant be bothered" attitude.

Tujuanku hanya UNTUK berkongsi dari pengalaman diri sendiri & mungkin ku juga pernah melakukan perkara yang sama.


1. Solat Terawih - Nak 8 Rakaat atau 20 rakaat & witir 3 rakaat?

Setahuku, kalau ikut sunnah Nabi Muhammad SAW, Solat Terawih hanya 8 rakaat yang di lakukan dari selepas solat Isyak hingga sebelumnya Solat Subuh. Tapi kalau ikut konteks negeri ini & cara kita bekerja, its impossible to do that - lagi lagi solat tu bawah blok...ada time limit. Pukul 10 dah tak lei bising bising.

Tak kira pilihan yang mana satu, pada pendapat saya, yang NAK buat 8 rakaat, pergi ke saf belakang & yang nak buat 20 rakaat, pergi saf ke depan..jadi bila dah habis 8 rakaat, boleh lah sambung witir sebagai penutup & terus pulang.

Tapi kalau separuh dari para jemaah yang buat 8 rakaat kat depan setelah selesai 8 rakaat terus nak pulang, ramai pula yang harus ke depan untuk memenuhi saf saf yang mahu membuat 20 rakaat. Ini menjejaskan masa para jemaah. Bukan itu sahaja, mereka juga berbual sekuat kuat hati & tidak menghormati para jemaah yang mahu menyambung solat terawih pada rakaat seterusnya.

jadi masing masing harus ingat, kalau nak solat 8 rakaat, harus berada di saf belakang. Kalau anda bersama rakan rakan mengerjakan solat terawih, beredar dari situ dulu sebelum berbual jadi tidak menjejaskan para jemaah yang ingin menyambung solat terawih.

2. Anak Anak Kecil

Ku suka pada budak budak yang mahu melakukan solat. Pada ku nak melentur buluh biarlah dari rebungnya.

Tetapi tak semua anak anak kecil yang mampu berduduk diam. Ada setengah setengah jemaah yang anak anak mereka menggangu para jemaah yang sedang melakukan solat.

Contohnya - anak anak dah mula menangis kerana terlalu lama di situ. tambah pula dengan keadaan kolong blok yang panas kerana tidak ada kipas angin sekitar tempat jemaah itu - mulalah ia meragam - menangis.

Let's face it, kebanyakkan bapa tak pandai memujuk anak.

Pada saya ada dua perkara yang boleh di ambil iktibar -

i.  pertama kalau anak itu masih kecil dan hanya ikut kerana di ajak orang tuanya, alhamdulillah, tapi si bapa harus memikirkan tentang para jemaah yang lain. Maka saya lebih selesa jika anak anak ini bersama bapa mereka, berada di saf hujung sekali atau paling belakang sekali. Ini kerana jika anak itu meragam, sekurang kurangnya ada ruang bagi anak kecil itu untuk ia bersendiri & tidak menganggu para jemaah yang lain sebab, sebelah anak itu ialah bapanya dan bukan orang lain.

ii.  jika anak itu sudah memahami maksud solat dan masih meragam, hendaklah di marahi anak itu secara sembunyi. Jadi ia faham maksud bapanya bahawa ia tidak boleh meragam ketika solat sedang di lakukan.

3. Pakaian

Pilihanku semasa bersolat jemaah kebiasaannya adalah Jubah atau baju yang melepasi paras peha - kalau boleh hingga ke lutut.

Ia amat selesa & menjaga auratku.

Ada setengah setengah jemaah - para remaja -  yang memakai T-shirt yang sungguh ketat & singkat sehingga apa bila mereka bersujud, ku boleh lihat seluar dalam mereka dan kulit pinggang mereka.

Ini ketika mereka bersolat sunat di hadapanku.

Hari ini yang paling mencabar bagiku, seorang remaja yang bersolat terawih sebelahku tidak boleh diam. mengapa? ia sibuk cuba menarik baju nya yang singkat setiap kali selepas ia sujud atau ruku.
Kamu boleh menuduh saya tidak khusyu' tapi BAGAIMANA saya harus Khusyu jika setiap rakaat sikunya terkena dada saya ? Yes he is very tall.

Apa pun ku sabar. Jadi berpakaian senonohlah sikit. its ok to wear jeans and t-shirt but make sure ur t-shirt is acceptable for prayer wear.

no point wearing fashionable, impress ur peers but an inconvenience to others.

jadi itulah pengalaman dari kaca mataku.. jika tidak sependapat minta maaf - saya hanya seorang insan yang hanya mampu bercerita dan memberi pendapat. Yang lain terpulang pada hati masing masing...kalau baik di lakukan demi para jemaah, teruskan lakukan.

Sekian :)

Preparation for Ramadan

Assalamualaikum to all readers,

Alhamdulillah, we are reaching towards the end of Syaaban and Ramadan will arrive again. Every year without fail, i will be busy preparing for it - physically - which is to clean the house, buy clothes etc.

Each year without FAIL except last year as i had two things that impedes me from preparing for Ramadan.

They are:

a. my sister's wedding preps

b. my late uncle sickness

I dont view myself as someone who is very religious or follow every thing to the letter. However, as I begin to age and with the death of my beloved uncle, things takes a new turn.

I view life differently as a new chapter unfolds before me. I take my time to decide on things and i shelved off non important things

Today i spend my morning and afternoon visiting graves and i visited my late uncle's grave too. 

Feeling sad and i guess we all have no other choice however BUT to move on. 

and moving on to a better state. To a better objective.

I have immersed myself in spending more time in work - since i joined a new department last year. Alhamdulillah, I will see the fruits of my labour this July 2012 and many more people will benefit from it - Insya Allah. 

The other part that i decide to follow is to decline all iftar invitation and i have decided to focus solely on fasting and nightly prayers.

I hope Allah SWT will give me the strength to see through it and follow it till end of Ramadan. I do not want to miss any good rewards that He gave us during this month - Insya Allah. 

Wish all of you the best for Ramadan and hope you will take this opportunity to focus on life's objective and redeem ourselves for the sake of Allah SWT. Amin :) 

Tahajjud

Assalamualaikum & Good Morning,

Alhamdulillah, it's Wednesday already - 20th June 2012. I had my IPT yesterday and I am still feeling tired but so far still good and Insya Allah for the rest of the day too and as usual, when you have dirty sweaty laundry, you don't keep them till the weekend to wash them, hence i slept like almost midnight as I decided to wash it together with whatever clothes that has been accumulated since Sunday. My laundry days are Saturday mornings.

Tahajjud is a voluntary night prayer, which was done by our beloved Prophet Muhammad pbuh. It has been related that it should be done about 3 or 4 am in the morning till Subuh.

The verses from Al Quran supporting this will be:

a. Al Isra Verse 79
(in malay)
Dan bangunlah pada sebahagian dari waktu malam serta kerjakanlah "sembahyang tahajjud" padanya, sebagai sembahyang tambahan bagimu semoga Tuhanmu membangkit dan menempatkanmu - pada hari akhirat - ditempat yang terpuji.
(in english)
And pray in the small watches of the morning: (it would be) an additional prayer (or spiritual profit) for thee: soon will thy Lord raise thee to a Station of Praise and Glory!

b. Al Furqan Verse 64
(in malay)
Dan mereka (yang diredhai Allah itu ialah) yang tekun mengerjakan ibadat kepada Tuhan mereka pada malam hari dengan sujud dan berdiri,
(in english)

And who spend the night before their Lord, prostrate and standing

There are many information on how to pray Tahajjud but I started off with 2 rakaat and lots of zikr and doa.

I have been having trouble sleeping for the past year or so and i notice that regardless what time i slept, i will wake up by 3.30am or 4 am in the morning.

Of course I am worried. What medical condition that i have that i cant fulfil my sleep?

Soon after, i was reading the Quran and came across the verses above and i started to read more information on it.

But last night was an experience totally.

I was so tired that I felt like sleeping and i know that since i am so tired, chances is i will miss subuh.
Hence, since i have yet to do Isyak I told to myself, wake up at 4 and pray - Isyak and Tahajjud and Subuh.

My eyes was wide open at 4 and quickly got up,wash up and prepare myself.

It is never about the quantity but about the quality and the consistency in doing it. Start slow and when you are confident do more and more.

There are benefits to performing Tahajjud though i would not want you to do Tahajjud to gain benefits. One should look at it as a completion of a daily routine or at least a sunnah that is being followed.

My intent was to start learning as I am reaching 31. I do not wish to wait till i am 40 to start doing all these extras - whereby your body may not be as strong as when you are younger.

In my own personal experience since i performed Tahajjud, i note that i am more patience in my dealings with my fellow colleagues / clients / relations. I realized that I cry more often alone - being afraid that my place can never be within those who are within His Favour.

I shared with my mother who encourage me to continuously learn and do it without any expectations.

Alhamdulillah, you can never guess His Favour upon you.

Last week, i managed to close 4 deals and those who are aware that I am doing sales now will know that closing deals = commission.

Subhanallah.

You have no idea how happy I was. Happy as in not proud happy but happy with tears glistening in my eyes each time i think about it.

I have no prior experience in sales and i am doing all i can, learn as much as i can to achieve my priority - which is to ensure that I can eventually take over my dad's responsibility so that he can slowly get away from the responsibility and start committing himself to Allah SWT.

It frees my heart from thinking about things i should not be thinking. I have no longer any desires except to make people happy.

And Insya Allah, i hope it may be continuously so.

An Open Letter to Cik Citi Nadia

Assalamualaikum Cik Citi Nadia, If you are reading this, thank you. It is not in my intent or position to bring you down. It is my hope that when you write something or submitting an opinion or a post online that's against the flow of the moment, think carefully. I first read about her when I came across an article in Asian Correspondent by the journalist Kirsten Han. From then on it spread across local newspaper, facebook page, posts & updates on everyone's wall. When such news are featured, it's for a reason and for Lil Nur's parents it's about saving their little girl in whatever hope that's left for them & that is to turn their plea to the community. With a salary of SGD 1699 and a one room HDB flat, it is obvious that Lil Nur parents' need help - in any amount in any way we can. You do the Maths lady: SGD 1699 After cpf After paying bills After paying household expenses After paying food After paying medication After transportation to & fro the hospital trips? What's left? Their plea came perhaps when they learn of hope that transplant is possible overseas. They made a choice to publish the news of Lil Nur regardless whatever the outcome they accept. That's faith. Alhamdulillah, it breeds positivity and I have no idea what's the total amount collected because it is not my business to know. We gave sincerely in our desire to see a child get well, her parents' hope for getting that transplant even it means they have to go thru such means. You & I will never know their whole life story and it's never right to speculate on anything or anyone. What they have received from all of us are sincere donations that's given by a community. They did not lie their way to get it and it's halal & sincere from us. In my opinion, they still have that medical bills to pay for and you never know if it's enough. At least we are helping our own Singaporean girl. Perhaps Allah in His Grace decide that Lil Nur parent's been struggling so hard for Lil Nur and this is His Favour upon them - that what the community has given them is a form of rezeki to pay off all that expensive medical bills or whatever they have spent in ensuring that their Lil Girl gets the best medical care possible. That's faith. Whatever it is do the right thing. If you are brave enough to publish that tweet and it was mentioned that you tweet it because you got the right to your own view, be a brave lady and own up. Apologise and move on. Allah Maha Pengampun and I m very sure Lil Nur parents will forgive you too. Insya Allah. Al Fateha for Allahyarhamah Adlea Ry'Kyla Muhammad Ghazali & to the family - be strong :)

Keredhaan

It seems more meaningful to write this entry in malay but for the benefits of the non-malay speaking I will try my best to write it in English and try to attain the same "feel" that it should have when written in Malay.

Keredhaan from the words re-dha (pronounced as ray-dar) which simply means - Trust. 

In this context Trust to Allah SWT.

Personally i find Redha goes well with Sabar (patience). 

If you are redha with a given situation and place your trust in Him and goes through it with patience, you are a winner. 

In life, there are many instances that you have to learn how to place your trust. 

I won't make comparisons among friends but i will just relate mine:

Majority of my facebook contacts are friends from different time of my life -  childhood friends, best friends, kewat friends, lesbian friends, whatever friends and as human, we will come across different types of people in our life.  

People are different, we are brought up differently and we are taught differently by our parents. As the eldest child and only child for the first 5 years of my childhood, I was very sheltered. Totally. 

When i started schooling, Euniz was born and that marks the end of pamperdom. I had to learn how to adapt to changes and i don't really adapt - at all. 

I have always believe that i can never relate to boys - they are smelly, loud, mischievious and rough. I was the opposite. 

Hence i mixed with lots of girls from my younger days as a child till today. I am comfortable with girls.

It is never smooth sailing though. I get teased a lot... which is pretty normal.. of course i admit i cried, i feel sucky, i got depressed, i went counselling and i rebel. I tried telling my mother but you know how parents are - they tell you to behave like a boy. But tell that to a 6 year old boy who doesn't understand WHY kids reject him back then and i said Am i Not A BOY (open my shorts and look in there!)?

And one day, it dawn to me that peoples' opinion dont really matter because i have mine. My life is mine to live and only Allah SWT judge. 

Who are they to bring me down? 

Should not they be helping me instead?

From then on, arm with a renewed energy, given a new lease of my life, i turn my life around to where i am today. 

Perhaps i don't earn a million dollars, but i got a million reasons to be happy. 

I can only look back that despite the numerous trials i face in my life, 2 things i uphold to: 

patience and redha... 

In my heart, i accept the reality of the situation. 

In my heart, i believe that eventually things will be better.

In my heart, i believe that with patience and determination, this part of my life will be over,

In my heart, i believe that with redha, you will eventually get what you want.

and all this is for who? not just myself, but the family that stood by me and see me cry every single day.

And i have always believe that those will ill intent will be fully rewarded by Him and i don't need to explain or resort to anything to make that happen. We have to accept the situation and we place our trust in Him and hopefully He makes it better for us. 

I accepted whatever they did to me and no matter how painful it is, i bear with it because i believe it is for me to endure. 

and with this coming situation that the family is facing, I urge all of you to pray for us in order to be guided by Him. Insya Allah, as a family, we will get thru this because we trust Him who decide all things. Amin. 

MacBook Air or MacBook Pro

I am contemplating to get myself either of the above within the next few months.

Currently i am still using the 13" MacBook White which I got almost 4 years ago and it is still in good working condition, i will not replace it till it decide to get bonkers on me. The shelf life is about 5 years so it is right time to start planning and saving to get one.

In terms of weight and size, of course MacBook Air is the favoured choice but MacBook Pro has the full complete functions - USB ports, DVD, bigger hard disk capacity.

I am not a very IT Savvy Guy but i know my way round. To me, as long as it is of good quality, different from WINDOWS (since i am using that in office) and affordable, i am ok and i am so used to using Apple Product. Look at the picture below:

picture taken from engadget.com

For more information on both products go to www.apple.com/sg

Now, help me decide which one after you check that site out by participating at the polls on this blog!

MacBook Air or MacBook Pro? Help me decide!

*by the way i am still jealous over the fact that Poly Students get special prices on their MacBook Pro!*

Al-Fateha: Ayop Bin Suri

About a month after my sister's wedding, our family and immediate relatives from the maternal side spend our day in grief.

We grieve for the passing of our beloved uncle - Ayop Bin Suri - 3rd November 2011 / 7 Zulhijjah 1432H.

I was very closed to him. People used to think that we are siblings till i told them that he is my uncle.

He died of cancer.

He passed away on Thursday night and buried on Friday after the Friday prayers.

My dad and i and that another uncle whom i don't like helped the undertakers to clean him before the final goodbyes.

The undertaker, for the final rites, he said this which brought joy to my heart, to my mother's heart,"Ketahuilah kamu semua, Allah telah berjanji tiap tiap muslimin yang meninggal pada hari khamis malam jumaat - syurga adalah untuknya!" Amin Amin Amin!

The ex-Mufti of Singapore lead the Jenazah Prayers when we stop over for Friday prayers at the cemetery. You can imagine our pride.

I love you Uncle. You are irreplaceable and only memories shall live with us.... Al-Fateha..

When he was a young boy with my grandma

When he was sent to KTPH about 2-3 months before he passed on

When he was in the hospice at Novena - the last 1 month. 

Final Resting Place

Al-Fateha

May Allah Bless your soul. Amin. 

Wedding of Yunizar & Hussien

My dearest beloved sister got married last year. The reception was held on the 2nd October 2011.

The family was kept busy for the wedding. There were many details to look into:

a.  Sleeping arrangements

The 2 sisters shared a room while the 2 brothers had a room each as I don't like to use the aircon when sleeping. Arrangements had to be made for the bride to be to have a splendid looking room before the wedding.

We engaged Roslan Renovation Contractor to do the renovation as:
a. he had done our renovation work back in our old home in Yishun
b. my sister wants a the same wardrobe that my parents had back then in Yishun and it is easier to explain to him on it
c. his office is very near to the caterer that we engaged for the wedding.
d. his price is reasonable as there were hacking works to be done too.

All the rooms was given a new look:

1. my parents master bed room
As the aircon pipes running around the place leaks in my sister's room, we decide to take the opportunity to look at it. As the assessment given that it is likely the pipes needs to be change due to wear and tear, it affects my parent's wardrobe as the pipe runs under their wardrobe too and therefore, there was a need to tear down their wardrobe.

2. my sister's bedroom
The study table / cabinet was hacked. During the assessment we informed the contractor that is likely to be a space under that window and we would like it to be replaced align it to the window. We were right and after the hacking, a sliding door cabinet was built.  The old wardrobe was tear down and a new wardrobe was built.

3. my brother's room
His room has a 5 door wardrobe shared with me and a study cabinet/table.
The cabinet table was hacked and replace with a sliding door cabinet was built in. I move my things out of the 2 door wardrobe  and my youngest sister occupy it . The 1 left was shared between the 2 of them

4. my bedroom/study room
I am having the smallest room. I had a study table/cabinet which was hacked and replaced by a built in. Mother built a 2 door wardrobe for me attached with a study table.
I moved my clothes there. I shared the wardrobe with my grandma's & aunt's items as they do come over once in a while and they left their clothes and items here for convenience.

As there are a lot of pictures, i have prepared them in flickr:

Click here for :

Before Home Renovation Pictures
And
After Home Renovation Pictures

We spend close about $9,000 on the renovation which we think is a fair amount.

Roslan Renovation has a good reputation and they understand what we want. There will be a Phase 2 of the renovation that will take place sometime next month and we will pass this next phase to Hamid & Sons.

So guys, remember this is the FIRST arrangement if you come from a big family to look into. Contact Mr Roslan for a good deal!

b. The Caterer

The search for caterers came after the official proposal hand in marriage. It was in April 2010 when the family of my then future brother in law came to propose for my sister.

I was asked by my mother to check out the prices - from expos to magazines to every single wedding that both my mom and i attended to check out their exquisite menu.

We found anything from $5000 to $50,000.

We were wondering too, how we can cope if indeed the final bill do come to that amount - however we put our faith in Him and believe that all will work out fine.

True enough, in 2011, my mother was walking around Joo Chiat Complex and for some reason she was attracted to this small corner shop on the 3rd floor - Salmah Manap Bridal Boutique.

The friendly nature of the matronly lady - Puan Salmah herself put my mother at ease. To my mother, Allah has answered her prayer. As this was the first wedding in the family, she wanted to give this business  to an experienced caterer cum planner.

We arranged for a food tasting session - at Clementi where a wedding was ongoing, and we were sold! The ayam masak merah is well cooked, quite a sizeable portion for each guest, the entertainment that was provided, the various deco to choose from and simple wedding favours for the guests.

We placed a $2,000 deposit to secure the date and we had to meet up with them a few times to finalize the whole menu. It was finalized a month before the wedding and after another $10,000 payment. Herewith is the menu:

1. Wedding Dais aka Pelamin
10ft Wrought Iron inclusive of chandeliers


2. Decorations
Bride & Groom Table with Fresh Flower
20 Round Guest Table with skirting
160 Seat Cover with Alternate Ribbons
Potted Plants (Palm Trees)
20 Fresh Flower Arrangement for Guest Table
Buffet Line with Fresh Floral Arrangement
Reception Table
Artificial Floral Arch
4 Aisle Stand with Fresh Flower Arrangement
Red Carpet
DJ Table + Cake Table
Ceiling Setting

Total: $2500.00

3. Solemnization - Menu for 100 pax
Nasi Putih
Ayam Lemak Cili Padi
Sambal Goreng
Beef Steak
Ulam
Salted Fish
Teh O
Bone Steak & French Loaf
2 types of kuehs
Blueberry Cordial

2 helpers for dish washing

Total $900.00

4. Main Wedding Reception - Menu for 1000 pax (buffet)
Nasi Putih
Nasi Briyani Dam (Kambing)
Dalca
Ayam Masak Merah
Sweet Sour Fish
Black Pepper Prawns
Sambal Goreng Pengantin
Rojak Melayu
Acar Buah
Bubur Pulut Hitam
Mee Hoon Goreng
Grapes
6 different types of kuehs/desserts
Ice Bed for the cold dessert
Candy Corner
Blueberry & Orange Cordials
Kopi O
Teh O

plus 100 packets of prepared dishes for guests to take home.

Wedding cake

4 helpers for dishwashing

Total: $13,100.00

5. Miscellaneous Charges
Kendarat  - $550
Music Panca Irama (11am to 5 pm) - $850
Gubahan - $250
Berkat aka Wedding Favours - $1500

FOC: Bunga Rampai 30 pieces

Total: $3,150.00

Caterer Final Cost: $19,650.00

We were very happy with their services and menu that was offered and prepared. Those who came, i appreciate very much if you can testify to their menu in my blog comments! :)

No amount of picture can justify their fabulous menu and i regret very much that i did not take time to snap some pictures of the food :(

But here is the link to their facebook account. Click HERE

The Mak Andam - Make Up Services + Photo/Video

I had wanted to do this for my sister very much but after she persuaded me not to as she told me that I am not an UP TO DATE pak andam and since i am the eldest in the family, chances is majority of the guests will LOOK for me after my parents.

Hence we look around again for mak andam and we settled for the famous Chantique Bridal.

My sister and I would prefer Abang Zul himself to do the make up but i understand that it will cost my sister more and furthermore, he was not available on that date.

On that day, Kak Salmah came instead and did the make up for my sister.

Here are some pics of the happy couple:

Solemnization Outfit

Kak Salmah

The Couple

The Last Costume

I can't remember their exact cost but it would be something close to $5000.00 inclusive of photography & videography.

6. About 3 weeks before the event, my mother have this wanting to desire to have a nasyid group to perform for the wedding which is from 11 am to 1 pm.

I knew she wanted that "A Romzi Group"

It's additional $650.00. Unfortunately, it's word by mouth only so whoever is interested, please let me know so i can pass you their contact.

(no, the charges for the panca irama which we engaged with the caterer was not reduced)

Total Cost: $34,300.00

This does not include, what we have spend on our own:

a. flowers for bride ($300.00)
b. vehicle rental for Saturday whole day + driver + Sunday morning ($350.00)
I don't drive hence i have to do this.
c. the back drop for the bridal room ($1000.00)
d. Family costume for the 2 days ($1000.00)

Alhamdulillah, He has been kind to us and we manage to clear all the expenses by the next day to the caterer.

I hope this entry has helped in an anyway to future brides & grooms and their families that it is important to have good support when you want to get married. At the end of the day, everyone wishes to have a great time.

Back For Good!

Assalamualaikum Everyone!


First of all, again i would like to apologize for my longest disappearance ever - for a year now! After the last post, I was in heartbroken mode - which is pretty normal for me.


I get heartbroken very easily - by love, by work, by life. I love everything but once I hate, I hate everything too.


Anyway, I have lots to share because so many things happen within a span of 1 year! 


Here goes! 


See the picture below? You see 1 extra guy right? Yes my sister got married last year October 2011. Introducing my brother in law. Will talk about the wedding preparations, wedding pics and see if i can put them somewhere for you all to read. I was quite busy with the wedding preparations as well. 

New Career Change
Last year June 2011, I switch a role in finance department - i move on to do credit control in May 2011. Hence i had to find someone to replace my current and guess who join me? I drag Abang Helfy to be interviewed and he got the job. 


However, due to my unhappiness there, I tendered in my resignation in September however the then department head from Sales & Account Management, spoke to me, interviewed me which resulted me to pull back my resignation letter and join them. I am happier of course! You don't make a switch and be unhappy. I learnt lots of new things. 


More challenges ahead but Alhamdulillah, I am managing it well. 


I have got lots of plans ahead and I hope to put them in place - Insya Allah! 


Hope I can get the same support like I used to - a bit difficult but i guess i have to start it with interesting posts again!